It is a rather sore subject for those of us living in the toe of the Bel Paese and something we briefly hit on during a post and comments a few weeks ago, but just for kicks-here are FOUR more crazy things I’ve overheard or been told lately here in Bella Calabria.
You know how in America people in your grandparents’ generation blurt things out, offer unsolicited advice and insist their way is the only way? Well they are like that here in Calabria, too. Only it isn’t just the old folks. About a month ago I was invited to dinner at a neighbor’s home. She made a salad-which in all honesty was a freshly cleaned head of lettuce-and asked if I wanted to add something on top. “Salt,” she asked? “Olive oil? Vinegar?”
“Sure,” I told her. “I’ll add salt and black pepper.”
photo credit: ansik
Gasp! Followed by a small step back and a horrified look. “Black pepper? On your salad?”
Finally she conceded.
“But just a little,” She added as she handed me the grinder. “It will give you a kidney infection.”
***
photo credit: toadstool ring
Speaking of kids, I went to teach English to one of my most preziosa students a few weeks ago and took her some “American” chocolate chips cookies I’d recently snagged at a local store.
Like most 10-year-old kids, she gobbled up a cookie in 20 seconds. When I offered her another one, she shook her head wisely and said, “Oh no, Cherrye. I can’t. Too much chocolate is bad for your teeth!”
(I mean isn’t that precious? How many 10-year-olds do you know who’d turn down chocolate chip cookies?)
***
Remember my classroom drama from the last few weeks? Well, Americans and Italians aren’t the only ones acting up in class. Last week, my friend, Laura, was working on an assignment-an assignment, remember that they take up and turn into the EU as proof of your class-and she wrote the date across the top. Our teacher immediately took her pencil and erased the date.
“We don’t need that,” she exclaimed.
Laura was puzzled. “Uhm. Why not?”
“We just don’t,” was the curt reply as the teacher took the paper and put it on her desk.
Just then, our Russian classmate leaned over to Laura. “You worry too much,” she said. “Questo è un paese menefreghista.” Or rather, “No one here gives a damn!”
(The meaning of course being … so why should you?)
***
photo credit: fauxto_digit
If you’ve spent much time here, you might have heard how general and vague the term “American” can be. Anyone from Canada to Argentina is often called an “American,” and some have even been referred to as being my “countrymen.” So it should have come as no surprise when one of my fellow “Americans” had just arrived in Calabria and was enthusiastically told, “You aren’t the only American here! I have someone you can meet.”
She showed up, ready to talk shop with a girl from the US of A and was promptly introduced to a girl … from Cuba.
“She’s not from America,” the American later told her contact.
“Well, almost …” came the quick reply.
“Cuba is not that far away!”
Have you heard anything cute, bizarre or funny lately? If so, please share!
BRINGING A WHOLE NEW WORLD TO KIDS AWAY FROM HOME
Daily News (Los Angeles, CA) June 6, 1995 | Yardena Arar Daily News Staff Writer E.T. phoned Palo Alto Monday – and the kids at the other end of the line probably never will forget the experience.
The famed movie alien served as the on-screen persona, or avatar, of his creator, filmmaker Steven Spielberg, during a demonstration of Starbright World, a computer network offering colorful, three-dimensional virtual playgrounds for sick children at hospitals around the world.
“Hi Mark, I’m Steve. I’m the ugly guy with the long neck. … Tell me about yourself,” Spielberg said, addressing a red bouncing ball that a patient at Lucile Salter Packard Children’s Hospital at Stanford University in Palo Alto had chosen as his avatar. website lucile packard childrens hospitals
“Hi,” a disembodied voice belonging to the ball replied via Starbright’s teleconferencing facility. “I’m 16 and I have leukemia. I live in San Mateo and I don’t know what else to tell you about myself. I’m kind of nervous.” Mark was one of three Lucile Salter Packard patients participating in the demonstration on the opening day of the Digital World conference in Los Angeles.
Vanessa, a 13-year-old cancer patient, chose a colorful fish, and Megan, 10, appeared as a drawing created by an 8-year-old friend and scanned into the computer – an option for kids who don’t want to use any of the 150 or so prefabricated avatars offered by the system.
“Kids, while a prisoner of hospital technology, will be able to be free under the blue skies of this technology,” Spielberg told an audience of reporters and invited guests.
Using a mouse, Spielberg navigated through three worlds in the virtual play area – a tropical jungle, a cave and “sky world,” which is made up mostly of clouds. Users see other users as their avatars or, if they so choose, they can see their actual faces as captured by desktop video cameras.
Starbright also allows use of third-party software. Spielberg played a game of VidGrid – a sort of Rubik’s cube puzzle in which the player must reassemble a scrambled music video – with a Metallica clip.
Starbright World’s official beta test launch is set for November, with four hospitals besides Lucile Salter Packard slated to participate: Children’s Hospital of Boston, Children’s Hospital of Pittsburgh, Egleston Childrens Hospital in Atlanta, and Mount Sinai Medical Center in New York City.
Starbright World was made possible by contributions of four corporate sponsors: Intel Corp. is providing the Pentium computers and videoconferencing equipment and software; Sprint is providing and maintaining the broad-band network linking Starbright’s main computer, or server, with the participating hospitals; UB Networks is supplying the networking equipment and services; and Worlds Inc. created the virtual worlds and provided the technology for the network’s multi-user capability. here lucile packard childrens hospitals
Spielberg, who chairs the Starbright Foundation board, said he hopes the network eventually will allow users to play virtual sports or shop in a virtual toy store. He spoke enthusiastically of the network’s empowering potential for children confined to hospitals for weeks and months on end.
“Maybe it’s just for an hour … but for that moment they are in total control, and we give them a place where their imaginations can run free,” he said.
Yardena Arar Daily News Staff Writer
Ha! Okay Cuba is in the AmericaS but it’s not part of the USA. Hilarious.
I know, right?
nyc/caribbean ragazza’s last blog post..Why writers write.
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I’ve seen this too . . . where other “Americans” in the sense of being from the Western Hemisphere *take offense* that we from the USA refer to ourselves as Americans, as if we’re then excluding them and once again lording ourselves over everybody. I don’t know what else we’re supposed to call ourselves . . .United Statesans!!!!
Can’t believe the little girl turning down the cookie — you can certainly send it my way!!
He he. And for the record… I ate the cookie!
Kim B.’s last blog post..On Friends and Guilt
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Hah! Good to know about the pepper on my salad.
Next time just follow it up by asking to put cheese on your fish. That always produces an entertaining response! 
Or by drinking ice cold water!
Laura at Ciao Amalfi’s last blog post..Spreading the Love: Saponissimo in Positano
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The pepper story reminded me of my MIL (almost) who was having fits watching me and my SO sprinkle cinnamon on our morning cappuccino. She told us it’s a drug.
The sad thing is that she really believes it.
MAH!
He he…
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All of those are lovably barmy.
I remember working with a lady who used to tell absolutely whopping fibs at tea break, with an expression that suggested she actually believed each one. Creme de la creme? She told everyone, in hushed tones, that her plastic-surgery-mad friend had gone to California and had everything replaced – INCLUDING HER ENTIRE HEAD.
Amazing what they can do nowadays, these plastic surgeons.
THAT is funny!!
Mikeachim’s last blog post..Nafplio: Where Home Tracked Me Down
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No one here ever really thinks about who is “English” and who is American. Scots,Irish,Cubans, Mexicans, what’s the big deal, eh?
Right … none of us are Italians!
Judith in Umbria’s last blog post..Opens one bleary eye
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Wonder if the teacher did not want the paper dated so she could show it another term in case she did not have enough work in her folder when asked? Interesting!
Bonnie(valentinoswife)
Definitely an interesting thought. I had no idea why’d she do that.
Bonnie (valentinoswife)’s last blog post..Open Doors…Closed Windows
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Well, I guess Texas is not too far from Cuba!
All English people are from London, by the way.
Lovely tales!
Best,
Alex
He he… thanks.
Alex’s last blog post..Swine Flu in Italy – Update 3
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