I met the group at the airport, along with our handsome guide/interpreter Andrea (who all the ladies tried to squeeze into their luggage for the trip back home) and our sweet but far-from-bilingual driver, Francesco. Somewhat quiet and timid on the ride to the Pollino, the group quickly meshed and by the end of the first night were already holding hands as they hiked to a hidden monastery and were singing, hopping and most-of-all laughing with each other as we danced the Tarantella.

The next few days were filled with a combination of long lunches, free-flowing wine, ruined castles, deep gorges, high peaks, pasta-rolling, cheese and wine-tasting and everywhere we turned, musicians, singers and would-be guides emerged to tell us more about “their” Calabria.

After four nights, we bid a sad farewell to our hosts-with the promise of a quick return-and headed south to Tropea. We stopped enroute so the group could have an upscale lunch of Calabrian seafood and chocolate tartufo and a secret behind-the-scenes visit to a local factory.

From Tropea, we ventured out to a nearby farm and learned the art of baking Calabrian bread and homemade pasta before feasting with the family on homemade *everything* – including, but not limited to, sopressata, ‘nduja, ragù, eggplant, peppers and pies.

We wrapped up our week at the luxurious private villa of one of southern Calabria’s most renowned chefs where we made crespelle (a specialty from my part of the boot) and enjoyed what was likely the most exquisite seafood meal I’ve ever had.

So many times throughout the week I forgot I was working … the group was tremendous and after a few days it didn’t just “feel” like I was with friends-I truly was. I left the tour Sunday with the renewed energy I believe vacations were intended to instill. Tour members kept thanking me, but their comments-such as, “after four trips, this is the first time I’ve seen the ‘real’ Italy, “this is the best vacation I’ve ever had” and the heartfelt “you pulled it off, kid!” are words of thanks I’ll never forget.

Tania and I are incredibly proud of the tour and are thankful to our guests for coming along on the first annual Calabrian Table Tour. We have already had dozens of requests for 2012 and will have our new dates published in the coming weeks. But until then, I’m going to have to find me a treadmill and a new pair of sneakers. Table tourin’ isn’t without its drawbacks. Or should I say, drawstrings. Which are the kind of pants I’ll be wearing if we keep this up.

Until next time … cin cin!

Are you heading to Calabria? Click here to see how I can help you plan your trip.

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So, imagine my surprise earlier this month when I noticed that Tripbase had launched a new travel blogging meme called My 7 Links. It’s gone viral and Lisa from Wanderlust Women Travel tagged me just this morning.

The idea behind the meme is to reflect a little on your last, in my case five, years as a blogger and to highlight some of your favorite posts.

So, here goes.

Most Beautiful Post: It’s hard to say, really, but I always like re-reading Where I’m From. Not only does it remind me of my family back in Texas but it reminds me of where I was mentally and emotionally when I wrote the post.

Most Popular Post: Well, I get a new email regarding my post Five Tips for Surviving a Long Distance Relationship every couple of weeks so I suppose I’d have to go with that one, although Ma Che Cz**o Fa gets its share of hits, as well. People sure do love to cuss in Italiano.

Most Controversial: Well, my 7 Posts predecessor said, “a travel site doesn’t get much more controversial than gelato flavors,” and she was right. I haven’t had too much controversy but I do think I offended a few people with my post, Italian Men Get Smarter with Age.

Most Helpful: If you are planning to travel to Calabria, then How to Ruin Your Trip to Calabria really is the most helpful post – even if you don’t know it yet (or choose not to believe me!)

A Post Whose Success Surprised Me: Ha, hands down it is How to Eat a Persimmon Fruit. This post was written on a whim when I looked out our window, pondering my next post topic and saw this beautiful orange and green tree staring back at me. It’s probably one of my most-read posts on the whole site.

A Post which Didn’t Get the Attention it Deserved: The Art of Italian Coffee: Caffè Baci in Downtown Catanzaro, I was really hoping someone would offer to teach me.

Post I am Most Proud Of: The Life and Legacy of Buddy Moore, the post I wrote one month after receiving that middle-of-the-night phone call no expat wants to get.

And now, I’m passing the torch to:

Lulu of Calabriasella Mia, one of northern Calabria’s newest expat bloggers.

Leanne of From Australia to Italy, a newly-married, new mom expat who moved to the province of Cosenza (via a stop in Rome) a couple of years ago.

Joe of Italyville, a first-generation Calabrian-American who owns an Olive Tree business and blogs regularly about the food, language and culture of southern Italy.

And just outside of bella Calabria …

Tina, of Tina Tangos, a tango dancing translator living in Puglia and

Sara of Amid the Olive Trees, an English professor who writes about living (and parenting) in Puglia.

Check out the list of previously nominated bloggers here so we can keep the project going.

If you’ve participated, please leave a note in the comments so I can visit your post.

Are you heading to Calabria? Click here to see how I can help you plan your trip.

Personally I’m a long-time Telecom client, myself. Noooooo …. not because their stellar customer service merits any such loyalty, but rather because they have a kick-ass calling plan that allows me to call unlimited landlines in the US, Canada and across Europe for €10 a month.

But still, I thought, I have to pay when I call cell phones in the US and more and more people are ditching their landlines, so having a fair-priced standby calling card never hurt. Right?

Right.

The guys at Enjoy Prepaid sent me a $20 credit back in May. I usually shy away from calling my family on their cells but with this nifty new card I’ve been able to call them and while I haven’t chatted at length, it’s been nice to be able to easily and inexpensively get in touch. I’ve used it to touch base with clients and for lengthy consultations … and I still have more than half of it left.

However, that’s not the best part.

While their cards do have decent rates-currently between $0.01-$0.03 per minute to call landlines in the US from Italy (currently $0.025 to call cells!), what I am really enjoying about the card is the ability to send text messages world-wide.

Depending on your plan (I have the Emerald Plan) it is free to send 160-character text messages to any cell phone-anywhere in the world.

Your friend on the other end won’t see your name or number as the sender (unless you purchase a virtual number with them) but just tell them “Intl Calls” is really you and you’ll be set. I’m also still trying to determine if you can receive texts from them – but I don’t think you can.

With all of their fun, Skype-like features, though, I found Enjoy Prepaid a little hard to follow. Yes, the calling card feature is fool-proof but to be able to call or text from your PC you have to download their software and there is a lot of activity and clutter on their homepage, which could make it difficult to quickly find what you need.

I’m not sure what overwhelming needs Enjoy Prepaid can meet that aren’t currently being met by online chat and Skype but I hope the best for them.

All in all, I’m *very* happy with the plan they sent me and if you’d like to try it – they are giving away free 15 minute trials to all new customers.

Enjoy and Happy Fourth of July, Americani!

Are you heading to Calabria? Click here to see how I can help you plan your trip.

Those of you who remember when the girls started the show, might recall that little ‘ole me was their first guest and guess what … ?

I’m baaaaaack!
(listen in here)

This week I’m sharing some summer travel tips with the girls, talking about our B&B’s new ancestry tours and getting Jessica hungry with details on the Calabrian Table Tour.

Now that summer is here, you can download the podcasts and take them with you on your afternoon strolls … that’s what we do. You can either subscribe to the podcasts (for free!) through iTunes or listen to the current episode and browse previous shows from their site.

Happy Listening!

Are you heading to Calabria or southern Italy? Click here to see how I can help you plan your trip.

Rather, I need to hear something oh, a gazillion times and see it written to really learn it, but the bigger problem isn’t my need to study. It’s my refusal to do so.

Luckily, there are ways around studying Italian that don’t include pens, notebooks or grammar books. In fact, all you need is a computer … and well, look at you-you are already off to a great start, aren’t you?

I’ve mentioned before that I like to improve my Italian vocabulary by listening to music. But now that I have a son, I am being introduced to new and wonderfully easy-to-follow songs that are ridiculously cute and insanely addictive.

Here are three Italian children’s songs I like to sing along to, with a link to the lyrics to help you learn the words.

Enjoy!

Il Pulcino Ballerino
Lyrics

I love this song and I just want to put that little boy in my pocket and take him to Texas with me. Actually … I kinda did. This is also Max’s favorite Italian kid’s song so I plopped it on my iPod, took it home with me and showed my family how my little pulcino could also be a world-class ballerino. I have it on video … maybe I’ll share it one day.

Il Coccodrillo Come Fa?
Lyrics

This is one of the cutest songs I’ve ever heard – in any language, especially when (in the version I have at home), the little boy asks what sound a crocodile makes and all the little kids behind him say … BOH!?! I could listen to this one over and over and over. Yes, I’m worse than a kid.

44 Gatti
Lyrics

Ok, this one is still too fast for me, but I love the big ball of pride that rises in my chest if, and when, I’m able to keep up. Plus a little math homework never hurt anyone, right?

Do you know any Italian children’s songs? If so, please list them in the comments!

Are you heading to Calabria? Click here to see how I can help you plan your trip.

Photo: Splash Scuola

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Last night I attended my first ever international “Bye Bye Boobie” party.

One of my expat friends here in Catanzaro was recently diagnosed with breast cancer. It was diagnosed on a whim and before she knew it, they had her scheduled for a mastectomy-a surgery that will take place in less than an hour of when I’m writing this post.

In typical “this girl” style, she’s taken this thing by collar and vowed to kick “his” ass. We planned a “Bye Bye Boobie” party and met at the hospital last night for the festa. There were cookies, pink lemonade, balloons and pink, pink, pink, pink, pink. The girls wore ribbons that said, “Fight Like a Girl-Kick Cancer’s Ass,” while the guys’ ribbons said, “Do you like boobies? So do I!”

Our friend, who no doubt heard our English cries of, “Is she in this room? “No!” “Is she in that one?” “No!” bounced out to greet us with a big smile and a tray of cookies and much to the disapproval of her 60+ year old roommates, was having too much fun to be sick.

Employees passed us in the hallway wearing her ribbons as Italian and English-speaking friends poured into the room.

My friend is facing this challenger with the heart of Holyfield and the fierceness of Foreman and we are pulling for her.

So, here’s hoping she floats like a butterfly through her surgery today and beats the mess out of this faceless opponent.

Are you heading to southern Italy? Click here to see how I can help you plan your trip.

This post originally appeared in 2008 but it sums up exactly what I love so much about the Easter celebrations in Calabria.

***

How many of you have ever been to church on Good Friday…you know, the Stations of the Cross service? How many of you have ever seen the Stations of the Cross – live?

Well, now I have.

Last Friday, yes…Good Friday to be exact was A’ Naca in downtown Catanzaro. Held every year, this processional reenacts the Stations of the Cross, stopping momentarily in front of several important churches throughout the city, while circling the downtown area.

We arrived just in time for the beginning – at exactly 4:26 PM. The church was already crowded, and there were several miniature Mary’s dressed for the occasion. There were four 10-foot crosses propped on their sides, and a confessional-full of other props and decorations just waiting to be needed

We waited.

We waited.

We waited.

Finally, we overheard…

“6:00? 6:00? It is going to start at 6:00? How will we keep the children occupied for that long?”

“Children?” I thought.

“How will I keep my husband occupied that long?”

And, so, in typical southern Italian style, we watched with interest the disorganization and scurrying around us. At 6:00, they opened the church doors and I saw this.

Hundreds, if not more, Calabrese anxiously awaiting – despite the cold wind and sub-Easter temps for the processional to begin.

My shock was momentarily distracted by the arrival of the star, who appropriately bent his head in solemn preparation for his big role as he pushed past the spectators to the front of the church.

After another half hour, they were ready to begin.

Musicians, clad in matching black and gold robes, heralded the commencement of A’Naca, as droves of clergymen and members from the various churches throughout Catanzaro began the processional. They strode out in groups, dressed in pastel colors of blue, pink or beige, representing their different churches.

Just before the final Stations, the Bishop appeared and along with other church officials, read a declaration.

Jesus is raised from the dead, and in undoubtedly the most dramatic point of the event, Catanzaro’s firemen heave the alter above their heads, as the crowd of onlookers gasp in amazement. Everyone cheers and a few women, standing bundled on the blistery street, dab at their eyes.

The processional ends with Mary, who while rejoicing in the salvation of her son, is carried throughout the streets of Catanzaro …

as dozens of young girls, dressed in like-clothing accompany her for the journey.

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I was torn, albeit willingly, from the safety net that had cradled me most of my adult life-no, let’s be honest here, most of my life-and I was on the cusp of adulthood. (Yes, the observant reader will notice I gave away my age up there and that yes, most Americans are considered adults by the time they reach that ripe old age, however, I was subconsciously preparing myself for this southern Italian life that allows 30 year olds to be cared for and groomed into their 40s.)

But that wasn’t the only thing I should have prepared for.

“I’ve lived abroad,” I thought … “I’ve done the expat thing. How hard can this be?”

Cute, huh?

I look back on these naive thoughts with a smile and just a twinge of sadness for the girl who thought them.

That girl didn’t realize how hard it would be to be an ocean away from her favorite family traditions. She didn’t realize she’d yearn for her little nephew as if he were her own and she never thought of what it would be like to become a mother 6,000 miles away from her own.

That girl had a dad who was alive. A 95 year old great-great-grandfather who played the harmonica and went fishing. An otherwise healthy grandmother and cousins.

She had it all.

As I sit here tonight-the sing-song cry of a 4-month-old baby buzzing in the background-I think about these last five years, about sacrifices and gains … a new language, a new culture, a new family.

I look at my husband, a wee bit grayer than he was five years ago, as he struggles with the swaddle blanket, then rhythmically rocks and coos our now-bellowing baby in his arms. He marches up and down the hall and the cries become muffled whimpers as our sweet, normally mild-tempered bambino gives up the fight.

He gives me a “thank-God-that’s-over” grin … the same side-grin his son has inherited, as he sits on the edge of the bed and closes his eyes.

In this moment, I think not only of my sacrifices-although they were indeed immense and life-altering, but I am reminded of all that is good about this new path. My mind fills with images of how my life has been enriched by this Calabrian experience. How I’ve had the opportunity to start my own travel business and work side-by-side with my husband and best friend.

I think of the people I’ve met, my virtual and new real-life friends and I realize I had no choice.

Life is a nothing but a culmination of the choices we make, the paths we choose and the decisions on which we act and no, there is no turning back. So, if I could say one thing to that naive, starry-eyed Texan who boarded that Continental Airlines flight to Rome five years ago today, I’d say this …

Embrace your new Italian life …

Tell your parents how much you miss them …

and for God’s sake, girl, don’t eat the airplane pasta. There’s much more of that to be had, on the other side of the pond.

Want to make some of your own Calabrian memories? Click here to see how I can help you plan your trip or sign up for the Calabrian Table Tour this fall.

Photo: Thumbnail photo by Calabria Mia Show

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A couple of months ago I admitted to my Facebook friends and fans that Ricci e Poveri’s “Sarà Perchè Ti Amo” had me bouncing around faster than a Globetrotter’s basketball on Kid’s Night.

Yea … I like that song. It was one of the first Italian songs I learned and I quickly noticed how memorizing the words increased my vocabulary and improved my grammar.

Over the years, there have been a few other songs that stood out and helped me get past certain grammatical humps, if you will. And I’m gonna share them here.

Enjoy!

Sarà Perchè Ti Amo: Ricci e Poveri
… because like I said. It makes me wanna bounce.

50 Special: Cesare Cremonini
My newest obsession. I have actually listened to this song so many times that I’ve made my husband hate it. How is that even possible?

Pensa: Fabrizio Moro
It’s slow, thoughtful tune and anti-mafia stance are enough to make anyone want to learn the words.

Si Può Dare di Più: Enrico Ruggeri
It reminds me of that Christmas commercial where the little boy’s eating the Bauli… you know what I’m talking about, expats!

Estranei A Partire Da Ieri: Alessandra Amoroso
The slow music makes it easy to follow along and really, who doesn’t love a good Italian love song every now and then?

Are you an Italian music fan? If so, what are some of your favorite songs? Have you used music to help you learn a new language?

Traveling to southern Italy? Click here to see how I can help you plan your trip to Calabria or southern Italy.

Photos: The Epoch Times

Tuesday was eight weeks since our little Max-just Max, no longer name, no middle name … just Max-was born in the Ospedale Pugliese in downtown Catanzaro. He was five-or six, my doctor now thinks-weeks early and noooo, we weren’t ready for his big debut.

However, the adventure really began two days earlier, on Saturday, December 18 when “I broke my waters,” as my husband told my mom and I was admitted into the hospital. Although we were taking a childbirth class, we had only completed about half of them and I had yet to tour the pale green corridor of rooms and baths that would be my home for the next five days.

Saturday night was a whirlwind of sights, sounds and emotions as I checked into the hospital and was pulled like a spoiled child in a candy store from my husband. “No boys allowed,” they told me at the entrance. “Say your goodbyes here.”

Gulp.

So, I crept through the darkened hallway-it was near midnight by this time-and was given a bed near the wall. The next two days I pulled around an IV that slowed my labor and spent most of my time chatting with the five other girls in my room. My husband was allowed in a couple of times a day during visiting hours and if I’d had a mother, sister or female friend around, she’d have been allowed to stay the night.

After lunch on Monday, the 20th, they removed my IV and told me they’d induce the next morning. I told my husband to go home and promised to call as things progressed. Around 1:00 AM that night I started having contractions and even though I’d have preferred to be in a private room surrounded by my family-or at least in this case, my husband-I walked the halls of Catanzaro’s maternity ward.

For the next hour and a half I rotated between the hallway and my room and bounced between a jolly, dark-haired nurse and my cell mates. Some of the girls and their mammas woke up and took turns rubbing my back. (We also played a game of robe-on/robe-off … meaning, I’d throw it off, they’d put it back on me … a dance that continued until I left the room.)

The hospital in Catanzaro doesn’t offer epidurals, so I’d planned to hire a private doctor to be there … just in case and I’d planned to take some of my doctor’s magical homeopathic medicine to prepare for labor and delivery. Both of these were planned for the following week, an irony that did not escape me, even in the throes of labor and the uncertainty of what was to come.

At 2:30 AM, the nurse told me to call my husband and led me across the hall to the labor/delivery room. Ten minutes and two mamma-mia-of-all-contractions later I was introduced to the bubbly, curly-haired OB nurse who would deliver Max.

She did a quick exam, told me Max was ready to be born and grabbed a clipboard and pen.

“Can you spell your name for me?” She asked ….

“What are you doing in Catanzaro?” Her assistant wanted to know …

“What is the highest level of education you received?” … again from the nurse …

“What about your husband?”

“I studied English in school,” the assistant said. I’d love to visit America …

“What is his job?” The inquisition continued …

“What do you do?”

“I’m a writer,” I told her between breaths, wondering how much more she could possibly need to know to deliver my child.

“A writer!” They both said, surprised.

The nurse put the clipboard on the table … “What do you write?”

Seriously?

“I feel like I should push now,” I told her, bringing the attention back to, uhm … me.

“It’s ok,” she said, as she stayed happily planted up near my nose. “Go ahead and push.”

“But my husband isn’t here.” I told her, wondering what was taking so long.

“He’ll be here,” she said. “Don’t worry.”

A few minutes later he did, indeed, show up, wearing a cute little green paper gown, shoe covers and matching hat. (You should realize that I was instructed to pack a white gown I could deliver in, but my husband’s “daddy attire” was provided by the hospital.)

I remember him being introduced to the nurse and her assistant, who realized they all grew up in the same neighborhood. He took over answering the remaining questions … someone else walked in and asked me to sign something … and about 30 minutes later-at 3:23 AM-Max was born.

About 10 seconds after that, my doctor walked in.

My husband and I got to hold Max and spend what seemed like a few minutes with him before they took him to NICU. My husband got to stay another hour with me, then I was rolled back across the hall into my room.

The next day it was business as usual and my husband was, once again, only allowed in during visiting hours. Our experience with NICU is a post in itself but suffice it to say that we all eventually made it home and we are settling into some semblance of a routine.

If you’ve had a hospital experience in Italy, I’d love to hear about it. Write about your experience in the comments!

Speaking of new moms, dads and getting settled, I’d like to wish a very special Buon Viaggio to my friend, Stephanie and her husband who, after waiting for this day for over a decade, are leaving today for China, where they will meet their new daughter, Andi, and bring her back to Texas. I’m over-the-moon-excited for you both and I hope you enjoy parenthood as much as we do.

Traveling to southern Italy with your kiddos? Click here to see how I can help you plan your trip.

As many loyal My Bella Vita readers have heard, my Calabrese husband and are gearing up to welcome our first child … a little boy … into our Italian-American family. He is due this month, so I just wanted to give you a heads up that-while we’ll still be working with our travel consulting business and our B&B-I’ll be cutting back to two posts a week here at My Bella Vita … at least for the next few months.

If you leave a comment, I’ll respond … it just might take longer.

If you send an email, I’ll answer it … as soon as I can.

If you want to come babysit so tired mom and overworked papà can rest … I’ll return your call immediately.

Thank you for four fabulous years at My Bella Vita and I’m looking forward to having many more conversations with you about Calabria, offering up more southern Italy travel tips and exchanging more food and recipe ideas over the next 12 months.

Happy New Year!

Are you heading to Calabria or southern Italy? Click here to see how I can help you with your itinerary.

Photo: Wire to the Ear

So, yes. I accepted. Even though Lulu couldn’t ship to Italy, they agreed to let me create a photo book for my nephew and I waited to write the review until after my mother had received and critically examined the book.

I’ve divided my review of the book-making process and final product into five categories and as you’ll see from my notes, I thoroughly enjoyed the project.

1. Options
A few years ago I created a photo book through one of Lulu’s competitor sites and so it makes sense that as I built this book, I instinctively compared the two sites. While Lulu has hundreds of options, ranging from size of book, hardcover vs. paperback, number of pages, over 20 themes, cover designs and inside layouts, I felt like I had more control over individual pages with the other site.

That being said, Lulu has more than enough options to keep you browsing for hours and since I had a self-imposed time line for completing this project, I appreciated the simplicity.

2. Ease of Creating Photo Book
Speaking of simplicity, one of the most time-consuming aspects to creating a photo book is uploading your photos. Lulu takes the stress out of this by allowing their users to upload photos directly from Flickr, Facebook, Photobucket or SmugMug. If you don’t have a photo account with any of these sites, you can also upload photos directly from your computer.

The “Lulu Studio” software automatically saves your work, so you don’t have to worry about spending hours on the project and then losing it and you can easily “undo” or “redo” photo placement as you progress through the project.

You can also quickly change the size, theme or number of pages, allowing you to play around with the design or change your mind without losing your work.

3. Customer Service / Shipping
While it isn’t exactly “personal” customer-service oriented, I love that their software warns you if your photo won’t print well. Additionally, I had a great experience with the intern I worked with on my photo book. She contacted me immediately when she learned of a shipping hiccup (FedEx, not them), contacted FedEx with an updated address and the book was delivered the next day.

She also included a personal thank you note with my order, which I loved. I’m a sucker for details.

4. Price / Value
The books are less than $20.00 for a 8.5X8.5 square hardcover book with 20 pages. This is about 25% less than I paid for the last photo book I ordered and from what I hear-thanks, Mom!-it is better quality.

5. Final Product
As I mentioned earlier, I had to rely on a third-party inspector to scrutinize the final product and compare it to the last photo book I made … and she loved it. The photos were clean and crisp, the cover page was classy and “expensive-looking,” … her words, not mine and she highly recommends them to anyone in the market for a new photo book.

So … are you in the market for a new photo book? If so, you are in luck. Not only did Lulu ask me to create a photo book, but they are also giving away one 20-page 8.5X8.5 square photo book to a My Bella Vita reader. Here are the contest rules:

1. Leave a comment on *this post* by Friday, December 17 at noon, Italy time. Your comment can be anything, but I’d really love to know what kind of photo book you’d create if you win.

2. Tweet the contest for an additional entry and leave a separate comment telling me you did.

3. Repost and/or “like” this post on Facebook for a third entry and leave a separate comment telling me you did.

4. A random drawing will be held on Friday afternoon and the winner will be notified so (s)he can begin working on their photo book before the holidays.

The book can only be shipped to a US address.

In bocca al lupo and Happy Holidays!

** Congratulations to Sabrina Sattler for winning the $25 gift certificate to Daryll Capparelli’s ItalianThings store at Zazzle.

Traveling to southern Italy? Click here to see how I can help you plan your trip to Calabria or southern Italy.

Like many modern bi-cultural families, my husband and I want to teach our children both English and Italian. We plan to implement the OPOL, or One Parent, One Language rule, which means I’ll speak English with our child 100% of the time while my husband speaks Italian.

Sounds simple, right?

Well the over-anxious, analyzing perfectionist in me is already thinking about the future. While the baby is, well, a baby, it is easy to speak one language to him and for us to communicate with each other using whichever language we prefer. However, what do we do when we start communicating together … as a family, sitting around the dining table, watching TV, talking politics or rocket science (because certainly he’ll be the next child genius to take the science world by storm …). What happens then?

Sure, we can plan to speak the minority language at home, but at some point the language he studies at school will take over and the other language will become his second language. I’ve seen it happen with my expat friends and heard tales of bilingual children who can’t cut it in a university in their second-language country.

I know I’m years away from that dilemma, but the topic and surrounding debate are interesting. One of my favorite blogs on the subject of rearing bilingual children is The Globetrotter Parent. While she doesn’t post as often as I’d like (I did say it was one of my favorites … daily would be good for me!) her posts are always well-researched and documented.

Other things I’ve been reading include:

Bringing Up Baby Bilingual, written by an American ex-French teacher who is teaching her children (and niece and nephew) French.

Raising Bilingual Children, written by a Venezuelan lawyer living in Germany, who is teaching her children Spanish, German and English.

Sue Scheff, particularly this article on 100 Tips, Tools and Tricks to Raising Bilingual Children.

An article in the Orland Sentinel about continuing the language immersion once they are “out in the real world.”

The FAQs at Linguistlist.org, with answers to questions about the OPOL method, imperfect accents, poor pronunciation and a Q&A that dispels the myth that multiple languages slow speech development.

I know there are a million things to think of-and worry about-as a parent and that with time, our child’s language skills will come. But even before we’re officially a mother or papà, we worry we’re going to mess up. I guess that’s just part of this new experience called parenthood.

Are you a parent to a bilingual child or do you plan to teach your children more than one language? What process did you / do you plan to use?

Are you heading to Calabria or southern Italy? Click here to see how I can help you with your itinerary.

Photo: iicedimburgo.esteri.it

As anyone who has ever been in love with someone who is more than a quick trip away will tell you, long distance relationships suck. It is amplified when your special someone lives in another time zone or if you are still in that “getting to know you” phase when you are forced apart.

All that aside, international LDRs can work and most of my expat friends have experienced separation from their significant other at some point during their relationships … and they all worked out just fine. If you are currently in an international long distance relationship, here are 10 tips to help your relationship survive.

1. Set Rules
Worried about being a nag if you “set rules” for your relationship? Think again. In his book, Long Distance Relationships: The Complete Guide, Dr. Gregory Guldner cites a study that claims 70% of LDR couples who don’t set rules end their relationship within six months.

2. Be on the Same Page Regarding Dating
Along that same line, make sure you and your honey are on the same page, especially when it comes to dating other people. My husband and I didn’t, but if you do, be sure to communicate openly and honestly when, and if, one of you wants to change that rule.

3. Set Times and Dates
I know it sounds like I’m obsessing over these rules, but knowing when you will hear from each other is vital for an LDR. My husband and I had one “set” time each day when he’d call me, so we both knew when we’d chat and had something to look forward to during our day.

4. Communicate Daily
Since the inception of Skype, communicating with your long distance lover is easier than ever. We didn’t have that luxury but as I mentioned, we still spoke every day. We had that one “set” phone call, then we’d call each other another one or two times throughout the day just to check in. Was it expensive? Yea … but not as bad as you’d think and now that you have Skype, you can forget about your pennies and centesimi and focus on your relationship.

5. Trust Each Other
I know, I know … easier said than done, right, but while trusting your partner is important for every relationship, it is crucial to the success of a LDR. There is no way you are going to know what he’s doing 24/7 and if he wants to stray, he certainly has the means, motive and opportunity. In fact, my husband came in while I was working on this post and I asked him for some input. His #1 tip … trust each other.

6. Share Your Insecurities
Oh, it is bound to come up at some point … he doesn’t answer the phone when you call, she can’t chat because of a work meeting and that nagging feeling is making you crazy. If you find you are constantly insecure and having “the talk” every few days, then you might have other issues you need to work on. However, if you are generally secure and something comes up that upsets you, address it. It could be something as simple as him calling later than normal because he wants to finish his new favorite TV show before he calls. Which brings me to my next point …

7. Don’t Create Drama
It’s hard not to wonder why your perfectly punctual partner doesn’t call when he says he will. You might envision him out with the imaginary hottie who moved in next door or picture him scoping the dance floor for a new fling. But don’t let your mind go there. You can’t do anything about it anyway and worrying yourself-or smothering him-will only damage your relationship and your self-esteem. Remember Tip #6 and discuss it.

8. Keep your Perspective
Richard and Kristine Carlson will tell you Not to Sweat the Small Stuff … and its all small stuff, they say. But in a LDR, the smallest things seem more important. However, keep your perspective. That one phone call can seem more important than it is because it is your one chance to talk that day but if you were in a normal, non-LDR, you wouldn’t lose it if you missed your boyfriend’s phone call.

9. Commit
All relationships take time to grow so depending on where you are in your relationship when it turns into a LDR, you may or may not want to commit right away. However, treat your LDR with the same patience and respect as you would a non-long distance relationship. At some point, you should both want to commit. If you don’t see yourself with this person 10 years down the road, then you are creating unneeded heartache for yourself and your far-flung friend.

10. Reflect
Speaking of committing, be sure you know who you are committing to. While flying off to Paris to meet your boyfriend will create a whirlwind effect that might seem exotic, don’t get caught up in the magic. It is easy to fall in love with the image of who someone might be, but make sure you are actually in love with that person as as you progress down the LDR trail

I know a lot of you have had a long distance relationship with your partner and lived to tell about it. What other tips would you offer?

Traveling to southern Italy? Why not get coached on when and where to go by someone who lives there?

Photos: Sara Hu via Flickr

In honor of our 3rd anniversary, I’m going to share some tips that have kept us sane-and happy!-in our travels.

1. Compromise the Planning
It is hard for two independent people who are, ahem, used to calling all of the shots, to learn to compromise their travel plans. I often find myself wanting to squeeze in extra vacation days, especially when we are traveling to Texas to see my family and friends, while my husband tends to worry over the details … you know, like paying for the trip and closing our business.

We’ve gotten really good at understanding each other’s motivations and the last few Christmas trips we took started later than I’d have liked (we didn’t get to Texas until December 22 or 23!) but lasted for more than a month.

2. Help Each Other Prep
Whether they are working to get ahead for their job, planning who will take the pets and get the mail or worrying that everything is in place, most people are ultra busy before a big trip. When you are traveling solo, you have to take care of all of the details. When you are traveling as a couple … yes, you do have some help, but there are also two people, with two sets of “lists” that have to be finished before you leave town.

When we are in the final prep stages before a big trip, my husband and I share our lists, divide them and conquer ‘em. This helps each of us feel like we are getting help, relaxes us before the trip and ensures no one starts our vacation with resentment or hurt feelings.

3. Take it Easy
… on each other, I mean. Yes, traveling is exhilarating, fun and exciting but it is also stressful. Before we set out for an international flight, which when we go to Texas means three flights, two layovers and oftentimes an overnight somewhere, we pledge to have a good attitude and not add unneeded stress to each other. At some point, usually when one of us gets too-easily agitated or moody, this turns into a joke and we laughingly remind the other one that they broke the rule.

This doesn’t work all of the time and no, it doesn’t eliminate travel-related stress, but I think our attitudes are what got us through the DC Blizzard last year with flight delays, an unplanned night near the airport and two new, unexpected flight connections in happy spirits.

What other tips do you have for couples who travel together?

Be sure to check out Robin’s travel tips this week at My Melangè.

Until next time … Buon Viaggio!

Traveling to southern Italy? Click here to see how I can help you plan your trip to Calabria or southern Italy.

Photos: Cecil Lee

Since the idea is to be pink , I won’t clutter this post with information, text, facts, data or prevention tips but rather, I’d like to share a photo of one of my favorite women in the world, taken this past summer on her 75th birthday.

My hope is that women across the globe will be able to share long, healthy lives and live to an age where their birthday candle is but a question mark.

I pray they can celebrate milestone birthdays with their doting husbands while being surrounded by their children, their children’s children and yes … those children’s children while indulging in one of the world’s sweetest and most delectable desserts … Italian cream.

You check out Mamma Felice for a full list of Italy bloggers who are participating in the pink post … and when you get a chance, go over to Bleeding Espresso and wish my friend Michelle, a grand auguri for her birthday today.

Traveling to southern Italy? Click here to see how I can help you plan your trip!

Just a few days before I left for my summer trip to Texas, my husband and I learned our family-like my waistline-would soon be expanding. In January, we’ll welcome our first child … a little boy … into our hearts.

I’ve had a remarkable experience here in southern Italy and apart from the occasional, ok, frequent, bit of strange and unsolicited advice … like not to be on the computer because it will hurt the baby … everything is progressing well and I have full confidence in the soft-spoken, bear-of-a-doctor we’ve snagged in Catanzaro.

Although I’m prepared-I think-for the hectic days and sleepless nights that await us, I don’t anticipate many changes with either this website or our travel consulting business. My husband and I are blessed to both work from home and with the exception of my far-flung family, I couldn’t envision a better situation for us to be in.

Later today, I’ll unroll a new Family Travel Section here on My Bella Vita. The section will include tips I picked up this summer when my nephew was here, as well as things I learn along the way about traveling in southern Italy with children.

Many of you have been here with us as I struggled to adjust to this new life, as we opened our bed and breakfast and when we tied the knot in Texas and I’m thankful to have you here as we embark on our latest adventure in bella Calabria.

Here are five tips I’ve picked up on adjusting to life when you are married to a foreigner.

1. Embrace Both Cultures
This might sound like common sense, but it is harder than you might think. I’ve found that in order for us to blend our cultures, we have to make a conscious effort to 1) learn about each other’s culture and 2) appreciate the differences. Some ideas we’ve found that help us embrace both cultures include varying our dinner recipes (for example, we had both Tex-Mex and Chinese food last week), watching both Italian and American sports (Forza Azzurri … uhm, How ’bout them Cowboys?!?) and even learning to watch and enjoy movies, shows and music from both countries.

2. Celebrate Holidays
Along those same lines, make an effort to celebrate each other’s cultural holidays. We are typically in the US for the Christmas season where La Befana has yet to travel, yet, lucky us-she stops by each year. While we don’t exchange gifts, we acknowledge the day and give La Befana gifts (that we’ve brought from Italy) to the kids in the family. Here in Italy, we celebrate, albeit without the fireworks, on July 4 and today-America’s Labor Day-we’re having burgers for lunch.

3. Learn Each Other’s Language
With the exception of #4 (see below) this might be the toughest tip of all. Yet, in the four years since I’ve lived here (and learned Italian) I can see a difference in how I relate to, and how much more I understand, my husband. There are some quirky habits in both of our languages that used to stump, confuse or even anger us. However, now that we know each language, we understand each other’s intent and that goes a long way in ensuring a happy marriage.

4. Don’t get Defensive
I think this is more of an issue for the native spouse, who’s expat partner can easily become stressed, irritated or frustrated by her new country’s nuances, but it is important not to get defensive. My husband is pretty great at this (if I can brag a bit) and lets me get away with mini rants and raves. In return, I try to keep them to a minimum and defuse my own defensive nature when he has something unflattering to say about the US.

5. Be Patient
Patience is the key to any successful marriage, but especially if you are with someone from a different culture, you should give them the benefit of the doubt (an expression I had a hell of a time explaining to my husband a few years ago) and be patient. For the native spouse, try to understand what your expat partner is going through, how she misses her family, friends and culture and be patient when she is moody or frustrated. For the expat partner, be patient with yourself and know that with time, you’ll begin to feel a real connection to your new home and those little things that once seemed oh-so important, will begin to fade.

They say marriage is never easy and I imagine a union of people from two different cultures, languages and traditions has even more obstacles to overcome. But remember what you saw in that person when you decided to move, or in some cases permanently stay, in a different country. Those are the things that are really important-the rest are just details. And remember … we’re not going to worry about those.

Traveling to southern Italy? Click here to see how I can help you plan your trip to Calabria or southern Italy.

Photos: Damon Green via Flickr and our personal wedding album

This post was written on behalf of AffordableCallingCards.net, a site that sells, in addition to other things, affordable calling cards to Italy. If you are interested in reading more about expat life, visit their expat community section of their site.

For many kids, spending a month in southern Italy-without their parents-is a summer they’ll never forget. Well, it’s also a summer this auntie won’t forget soon. So far, we’ve talked about falling in love on the lungomare and about meeting a real-life beach bum in Pizzo but today, in our final installment of Auntie Adventures, I have to tell you about the real deal.

Yes, loyal readers, you will notice that is not me in that thumbnail shot above. The lovely lady you see with my nephew’s heart in her teeth works at “The Panino Place,” in Catanzaro Lido and is named Andreea (pronounced “An dray a”-like in Italian, not the American “Ann dree a”).

It was a typical Catanzaresi night like any other-the air was fresh, the lungomare was full of people and Triolo, or “The Panino Place” was as bustling as ever. The smiling Andreea stopped by our table to take our order. Cole plopped his eyes back in his face-a goofy grin taking over the bottom half-and whispered … “e bella.”

We kinda laughed and since my camera was sitting on the table, I said, “Do you want to take a picture with her?”

Excitement, then fear-and I think a little nausea.

“We’ll ask her for you.” We promised.

When Andreea returned, we told her Cole wanted to take a picture with her.

“You’re joking,” she said. “I don’t believe you.”

“It’s true,” I insisted. “Tell her Cole.”

He nodded his little head in rapid-make that, rabid, movements. “Si,” he said. “Si, si.”

And then, something happened that forever changed the way my baby would see Calabria.

She kissed him.

Yes, it was a generous, friendly kiss on the cheek, but to his nine year old heart-and undoubtedly to the ears of his eager friends back home-it was the real deal.

We snapped the photo, she ruffled his hair and went on with her night.

“That was more than I could have ever imagined,” he muttered, as his panino, once fresh and hot, remained untouched on the table, appetite forgotten.

A few days later, we were in the car-me, thinking about the next stop or what to cook for dinner or some other insignificant detail such as that, him, dreaming of Andreea.

“I know what I’m gonna tell my friends when I get home,” he said.

“Oh yea,” I said, pulling myself away from my mental list. “What’s that?”

“I kissed a girl and I liked it.
The taste of her cherry chap stick.
I kissed a girl just to try it.
And she was 20 years old.
It felt so right-it felt so wrong
I think I’m in love tonight.”

I laughed, “Good one!” I said, as I looked back at him.

He was grinning. Wistful. Gazing out the window.

Being the devoted aunt and uncle we are, we visited “The Panino Place” three or four more times over the next 12 days. Each time Andreea greeted him with a big smile, a happy hug and a big ‘ole smack on the cheek. She even wrote him a love letter, in broken English, and presented it to him in front of her colleagues.

He wrote her a song-although she never heard word of it-with a catchy 20s feel, about her name and her eyes.

A week before his departure, we made one more visit and although he held up well during that final goodbye, he fell into Uncle Peppe’s arms just moments away from the pub.

“But I’ll miss her,” he cried to Peppe. “I love her.”

Peppe looked at me, I looked at Cole.

“I know, Cole. But don’t worry. There will be others.” I told him.

“But not like her,” he insisted. “She loved me and I loved her and it will never be like that with anyone else.”

“Waaaaaaa …”

And then, Peppe panicked.

“Don’t cry, baby. It is ok. We’ll come back again before you leave.”

And whaddya know. It worked.

The crying stopped, but he still needed Uncle Peppe to carry him to the gelateria down the street.

“You can walk now, Cole,” Peppe told him. “We’ll come back.”

“I can’t walk,” he said. “I’ve dehydrated myself with my tears.”

And so it was, the unlikely love story of a starry-eyed Texano and a young panino server named Andreea. And I think it’ll last. I now have one new friend on Facebook and Cole is back home, knocking on doors in his gated community in Wildwood, Texas, asking friends and neighbors for odd-jobs and extra work to save up for his big return to bella Calabria.

Traveling south? Click here to see how I can help you plan your trip to Calabria or southern Italy.

This post is written on behalf of AffordableCallingCards.net, the site that sells-you guessed it-Affordable Calling Cards to Italy. Click here to read other posts written by expats in Italy and Switzerland from in the ACC community.

You see, I’m convinced there really is something to that Aria Calabra that changes a once innocent, well-meaning, pooch-petting boy into a hormone-ranging mostro.

And it all started in Pizzo.

Auntie Adventures: Italian Beach Bums

Pizzo is one of my favorite little villages in Calabria and since it is only 45-minutes or so from Catanzaro, it made for a sensible day trip. We headed out-on the train … more on that later-to check out the Murat Castle, go swimming in the Tyhennian Sea and taste-test tartufo in Pizzo’s main piazza.

And all went according to plan.

We toured the castle, I forced a picture of Cole and a statue, we had tartufo.

Then we went to the beach. In fact, we found an ideal cove of tan sand and rocks, just large enough for a few people and their beach towels, and plopped down to enjoy a few hours of private beach bummin’,

The boys had a great time and just before I called “time’s up,” they swam around the big boulder to my right-to another hidden bay of private beach bliss and had the surprise of their young lives.

A topless sunbather.

I looked up and saw Cole, stumbling towards me in a drunken stupor, wide eyes, goofy grin.

“Cici!” He said. (See, he is still a kid-he calls me by a special name.) “You’ll never guess what we saw. A woman without her bra!”

I jumped up. “Ok, boys. Time to go. We’ll miss the train … Come on. Andiamo!”

They reluctantly joined me and immediately started sizing her up.

“They were so big,” Cole said. “I gotta call Uncle Peppe!”

“They weren’t that big,” the older and wiser 14 year old, Jake told him. “She was probably a ‘C’.”

“They were big,” Cole insisted. “And there were like, nipples or something.”

“Enough, boys! Basta.” I had to stop it. I flashed back to October 17, 2000-just seconds after he was born-it was too soon to be hearing about nipples.

We hopped on the train and an hour or so later we were back in Catanzaro-the boys wearing a bit more pride on their upturned chests, Cole, with a glimmer of knowledge that shouldn’t be there, shining in his deep green eyes and me, with all of the stress and worry of an aunt who’d just allowed her sister’s nine year old child to grow up a bit too soon.

But all’s well that ends well. My sister laughed and forgave me, Cole thinks I’m the coolest aunt in the country and I’ve learned there is a lot more to beach bums than should ever meet the eye.

Traveling south? Click here to see how I can help you plan your trip to Calabria or southern Italy.